Healing is on the Other Side of Fear
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’
ELEANOR ROOSEVELT
I’ve been really in my feels lately. Like really, really emotionally aware of the people around me. My empathy gear is in full motion and I’m brought to tears when I feel the pain of someone around me. Listen, I don’t cry. Well, I guess I shouldn’t say never but it’s a rare occasion.
I’ve been so curious about why my awareness is heightened right now. Is it because I’ve finally started to dive into my own personal healing? Maybe so. It’s been eight years since my last major loss and you’d think I’d be pretty well healed by now, wouldn’t you? You see, life goes on and you must go on with it. I’ve been going through the motions for eight years and doing whatever I had to do to suppress anything painful. I’m just now digging it all up and laying it on the table, so to speak.
Avoiding my grief hasn’t served me well. As a naturally resilient person, I believed I was just a rare breed that didn’t feel things for myself. Turns out by not handling my emotions they were actually handling me. I’ve played the tough girl mantra card for too long. It’s not serving anyone well. Not me. Not my family. Not my friends. Not the people that look to me in their grief. So, I’ve decided to declare this year a year of healing for me…whatever it takes. I’m scared, but that’s okay. Healing is just on the other side of fear.
I’m currently working with a coach and developmental editor to write a book that tells my story from a vulnerable, but hopeful place. In a way, I think this is going to be very therapeutic. I have to say thank you to all who have purchased the journaling decks and other items I’ve put out. The profit from all sales is why I’m able to hire someone to work with me as I get this book project off the ground. You are helping me get my story out into the world and I love you all for that. (Cue the tears – told ya…them feels are really big right now).
Another thing I’ve been working on is a grief journal to help guide others along their journey. I’m currently working on the cover design and plan to have that ready to roll out by the summer. I’ve been studying grief and looking at it from different angles and perspectives in hopes it’ll speak to anyone grieving a loss. I don’t want anyone to stuff what they are feeling like I did because it comes out in unhealthy ways.
From my research, I want to share five ways to fully feel your feelings:
- Give yourself permission to feel your emotions. It sounds really simple, but when you are caught up in the web of life, you must slow down and even come to a full stop and ask yourself: “what am I feeling right now?”
- Express your emotions. By expressing your emotions you can make sense of them. Talk to a trusted friend or family member, write in a journal, or do something creative like drawing or painting.
- Engage in mindfulness practices. Mindfulness can be prayer, meditation, or deep breathing. It helps you develop a greater sense of acceptance and compassion towards yourself and your feelings.
- Connect with nature. Go for a golden hour walk and really look at the sunsetting landscape, go for a hike and notice all the little hints of life around you, or sit out in your backyard on a sunny day and notice the breeze and the sounds.
- Get in some physical activity. Physical activity is a great way to release pent-up emotions and improve your mood. Exercise releases feel-good chemicals that can help you feel more positive and energized. Find something you enjoy – walking, running, yoga, or dancing. Just find ways to move.
It’s never easy to stop and examine what’s going on internally, but I’m learning more and more that it’s imperative to live a great life. I think we all deserve to be happy and fulfilled. I hope you find feeling your feelings gives a new perspective and makes you feel lighter and freer. I know each step I take toward my own personal healing knocks a brick or two off my shoulders and it feels pretty darn good.
Remember: Healing is just on the other side of fear.
Photo by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash
Jessica is a blogger who found her voice when faced with loss after loss. In her grief, she turned to writing and is passionate about sharing the power of journaling with others. She created The Journals by Jess, a community and brand known for teaching writing techniques and creating fun and functional writing tools. From journaling prompt cards to pens, candles and mugs, each product is intentionally crafted to help you begin a journaling ritual or to enhance the practice of a seasoned writer.
Jessica is here to inspire you to grow and help you reduce stress, and find more joy and clarity through journaling.
It is her mission and true passion to help others navigate the ups and downs of life! Reach out to her by clicking here!
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Cecilia Fulkerson
Love this!
Jessica
Cecilia FulkersonThanks for reading!